ends JoeC

“I love you.”

“I love you too Jaycee. You’re my bestest friend.” Justin hugged his friend close kissing his cheek.

The curly haired brunette sighed not wanting to press the subject but knowing he had to; it was killing him keeping silent about his true feelings. He had to tell Justin how he felt. “Justin, I love you … I want to be … with you.”

Justin sat up slowly his face unreadable. “You want …. What?” surely he had misunderstood his best buddy. He physically drew away as JC’s eyes began to tear up.

“I’m in love with you Justin, I’ve always loved you.”

“You’re a fucking Fag!”

JC felt the hate hit his body. One sentence he had never wanted to hear from Justin rolled from his mouth, slapping him in the face, belittling him and the feelings he had hidden painfully away for ten long years. “You fucking shirt lifting fag.” Justin got off the couch backing away from the tear stained man as if he was infected with a contagious disease.

“Justin please!” JC begged he reached out and caught hold of the younger man’s sleeve and was dragged to the floor as Justin yanked himself free.

“Get your fucking faggot hands off me!”

The older of the two recoiled from the fury that was directed at him, his blue eyes massive and fluid turning grey with the absolute desolation that tore through him with the ruthlessly sadistic barrage thrown venomously in his direction.

“Justin …” the brunette was on his knees reaching out imploringly. Tears cascading freely down his face. “Please can’t we … can’t we just talk about this … I love you.”

Justin mouth twisted in anger. “ You love me!”

“Yes.” the reply was barely a whisper.

“Well I don’t love you.”

JC’s world imploded.

“I could never love you. You disgust me. All this time JC all this fucking time I thought you were my friend and all I was to you was a piece of ass.”

“Its not true.” he knew he sounded piteous but he had to try had to convince Justin that it was never like that. “I love you … I’ve loved you for so long. Please Jay don’t do this to me … don’t hate me.”

Justin smirked “Hate doesn’t even come close to what I feel for you right now.” he grabbed his jacket from the chair and stomped towards the door.

“JUSTIN … DON’T LEAVE ME! Don’t leave me…” The door slammed and emptiness descended over JC. He started to shake, tremors consuming him, convulsing through his slight form. His tears were soaking his shirt as he stared stunned at the closed door willing it to open, for the love of his life to come back in take him in his arms and say it was all a big mistake, that he just misunderstood, that he loved him too. But he didn’t. JC closed his eyes squeezing even more tears free as he say back on his heels and wrapped his arms round himself hugging his body as he rocked back and forth, back and forth. He couldn’t breathe, the pain in his chest was suffocating him as his heart shattered into a billion pieces and were ground into the carpet by the vicious words that still echoed in his ears. A sob tore from his throat and he fell backwards contracting his long limbs into the foetal position as he cried and cried. He’d lost the only person in the world he had ever loved, ever needed. He lay like that for hours his body refusing to obey him.

The clock in the hallway struck three, was it only five hours since his world had come crashing down round him burying him in the rubble. He curled into a tighter ball willing himself not to feel anymore, wanting nothing more that the incredible pain to stop, to evaporate. Justin had spurned him, destroyed him. In the darkness of his living room JC’s spirit died.

“Where’s JC?” Lance glanced round the room expecting the skinny singer to suddenly materialise. “You told him about today didn’t you Justin?” he turned his attention on to the younger man who was slouched uncaring in a chair in the corner of the room.

“I told him,” he snapped. “Probably couldn’t drag his faggot ass out of bed.” He muttered under his breath.

Joey’s head snapped round he was close enough to make out what Justin had just said. “What did you just call him?” the Italians eyes flashed dangerously. The infuriated edge to his voice was enough to attract the two remaining members of Nsync’s attention. “What’s going on Justin?”

The blond snorted and picked up the TV remote, flipping through channels ignoring the question.

Joey loomed over him “What’s going on Justin? You saw him last. What happened?”

Justin threw the remote onto the table. “He made a pass at me if you really must know.” Joey’s mouth dropped open. Lance sighed deeply and Chris gasped out an incredulous “What!!!”

“Yep fellas, our butter wouldn’t melt front man is a fucking faggot, a fudge packer.”

Lance spoke quietly while the two brunettes were reeling with this sudden new information. “What happened Justin, what did you say to him?”

“What did I say to him! I told him to get his dirty fucking faggot hands off me. What the fuck do you think I said to him!”

Lance paled and spoke even more softly. “But you didn’t say that to him did you? You were more tactful than that, please say you were!” he clenched and unclenched his fists that hung by his side.

Justin snorted “yeah right I did. I told you what I said.” He reached out for the remote again.

“You unfeeling bastard.” Lance lunged at the unprepared younger man seizing his throat between strong fingers. Justin gasped for breath as Chris and Joey struggled to release him from the furious grip of his band-mate.

“You fucking asshole.” Justin gasped as he rubbed his brutalised throat. “What the fuck got up your ass?”

Joey eyes blazed at the younger man. “Just shut the fuck up Justin, you deserved that. We should have let him finish you off only we don’t need Lance up on manslaughter charges right now. Not with JC AWOL.”

Chris had draped a comforting arm round the green-eyed blonds shoulder and was whispering quietly in his ear, calming and comforting him. Lance looked up his eyes stormy and angry. He nodded as the thick set brunette whispered something else to him. He took a deep breath. “When was the last time anyone spoke to Jace?”

“Monday” Joey said.

“Well I spoke to him Tuesday.” Chris said. “Anyone speak to him since Justin there felt the need to rip his heart out and stamp it into the ground?”

Everyone looked at each other. Joey spoke. “We need to get to him fast.” they grabbed their coats and made for the door. Joey stopped and turned noticing that Justin hadn’t moved. “You coming?”

Justin switched channels again ignoring his friend. “You really are an asshole you know that?” Joey spat, angrily slamming the door behind him.

They drove in silence to JC’s house too scared of what they was going to find to make small talk. The house was dark and empty looking when they arrived. They got out the car and went to the front door unsure of whether to let themselves in or to ring the bell. Lance made the decision and let them in with his key. Splitting up they started to search for their missing band-mate and friend.

Joey went into the kitchen it was empty. He turned ready to leave then he heard a small almost silent sob.


A small shuffling sound and a whimper let him know he was right. He made his way round the kitchen island. He choked back a gasp as his eyes landed on the slim brunette curled up on the floor. He was a mess, tearstained and dishevelled; on the side there was still the open bottle of wine and the pan of pasta that was to have been dinner. Next to JC on the floor was a ring box open and discarded, inside a sapphire and platinum ring gleamed mockingly. Joey moved slowly so not to startle him, crouching carefully beside him.


JC covered his head with his arms and began to cry. Joey squeezed his eyes closed willing his tears away. “JC, it’s going to be alright honey, lets get you off the floor.”

The slender man curled up tighter sobbing uncontrollably, shaking his head refusing to be helped. Undeterred Joey wrapped his arms round him and lifted him up carrying him into the living room. He laid him gently on the oversized couch and brushed his hair from his eyes. “Don’t cry JC please.”

“I lost him Joey. I lost him.” JC began to cry harder as Chris and Lance joined them.

The Italian lifted him up crushing him to his chest ignoring the tears and mucus soaking his shirt as he rocked him rubbing comforting small circles on his back.

“I’ll make some tea.” Chris went out into the kitchen and filled the kettle. As he plugged it in he caught sight of the ring. He lifted it up studying it. It was beautiful, expensive, simple all rolled into one. He stiffened as a hand rested on his shoulder, relaxing as he realised it was his lover.

Lance sighed sadly “He’s in love with him Chris, look at that ring. How could Justin be so heartless?”

Chris turned into his lovers’ arms and pulled the younger mans head down to rest on his chest and kissed the blond soft spikes. “JC’s a broken man. He needs us now more than ever.”

Lance sighed again softly and snuggled his boyfriend. “Its my fault Chris, I persuaded JC to tell Justin how he felt. I didn’t know, I never even considered that this could happen.”

“Don’t blame yourself honey. Justin is the one that tore his world apart not you.”

“He’s so hurt Chris, he has been on that floor for days. How will he ever get over this?”

Chris nuzzled Lance’s hair. “He has good friends that’s how.” the kettle clicked off and the pair broke apart so that Chris could make the tea.

“Make it sweet, he’s in shock.” the brunette scooped three big teaspoons of sugar into the steaming golden brown liquid before adding the milk. They took the mug into where Joey had JC wrapped up in his huge bear hug. He pushed JC away just enough to hold the scalding liquid to his lips.

“Drink this baby.”

JC turned his head away shaking it lightly refusing to swallow the hot sweet tea. “JC you have to drink something, please Jace.”

Two azure blue eyes lifted tearfully. “Sleep.” he muttered and curled away from the big man burying his face into the soft creamy brown fabric of the sofa.

“No JC, drink first sleep later, I’ll take you upstairs and I’ll even stay with you.” Joey lifted the older man back into a sitting position and lifted the cup back to his lips. JC relented and sipped the hot fluid. “Too sweet.” he moaned.

Chris sat on the arm of the couch and played with the bronze curls on JC’s head. “Sweet is good Jace.” the slim man took another sip pulling a face at its sweetness before he pushed it away.

“Just want to be alone.”

Lance sighed and crouched before his friend. “We know what Justin said to you. He was wrong he had no right to treat you so badly. But you know he’s not speaking for all of us don’t you? Jace you do know that?”

JC looked away not wanting to make eye contact with anyone as his eyes began to tear up once more. “He hates me.” a small hiccup caught in his chest as the tears started to fall once more “He called me a f-f …”

“Don’t Jaycee, don’t torture yourself.” the three members of Nsync closed ranks round their beloved member as Lance spoke. “ He had no right to say that to you. No right at all.” Lance thumbed away a tear from JC’s face.

“Baby you know Chris and I are together.” JC nodded. “And do you call us faggots?” JC shook his head. “Then why should anyone call you that?”

“You wouldn’t, but he did.”

“Come on I’ll take you upstairs.” Joey said as he slipped his arm under the fragile man. JC wrapped his arms round his neck and hid his face against the broad shoulder as his tears started anew. Joey kissed the bronze curls on top of JC’s head and carried him up the stairs.

Joey kicked open the door to JC’s room, and carried him over to the bed laying him on top of the cinnamon duvet and sitting down beside him. The brunette pulled his knees to his chest and turned his back on his concerned friend, his shoulders shaking with silent sobs.


Joey tried not to roll his eyes as he placed a comforting hand on the bony shoulder. “Jaycee it will be alright I promise.” the only answer he got was the gentle heart wrenching sound of weeping. Joey folded the quilt over the reed-limbed man. He hesitated wanting to say more but not able to find the words that could bring comfort to his distraught friend. He snuck out of the room cursing himself under his breath for whimping out as he closed the door behind him. He looked up jumping slightly as he was greeted with round jade orbs staring back at him.

“How’s he doing?”

Joey scrapped his nails over his scalp. “Not good. I could fucking kill Justin for this!”

Chris pulled Lance to him pressing into his back his arms wrapped round his waist. “You and me both Joe. It’s time I think that we teach that little shit the true meaning of friendship. Starting with me and Lance.”

The blonde stiffened in his arms “You wanna tell him about us? But you saw how he reacted with JC.”

“The only reason we never told him before was cus we thought he was too young to handle the truth. Well if he is old enough to destroy his best friend then he’s old enough to deal with the fact his two other best friends are in love.” Chris waited a minute to see if Joey disagreed smiling when he saw that the dark haired man was nodding solemnly. “We will tell him tonight when we take JC to confront him.”

“Whoa.” Joey’s head snapped up “JC isn’t strong enough to confront anyone.”

“We’ll be there to support him.” Chris kissed Lance’s shoulder. “They have to meet sometime.” Lance look worried and unconvinced at his lover, Joey grunted an affirmative grunt. “The longer they leave it the harder it will be, they need to deal with this if they don’t then we may as well kiss Nsync goodbye.”

Lance sighed sadly and leaned back against Chris’ hard torso.

“Joey?” Chris raised his eyebrows waiting for an agreement.

“Yeah ok. You bringing Justin here or am I bring JC to him?”

“You bring JC to us at Lance’s house. Is that ok baby?” Chris leaned back slightly so he could see the blond mans face.

“Yeah sure 8 o’clock, I’ll get Justin there with some bullshit or other.”

“Ok then.” The 30-year-old man tugged at his beard before taking his boyfriends hand and leading him down the stairs, Joey close on their heels. “You staying here Joe?”

The Italian man shrugged “I guess I’d better.”

The three band-mates hugged and said their goodbyes unaware that they were being watched from behind a curtain through tear-filled eyes.


JC was sat huddled in a chair his knees drawn up to his chest. Lance brought him a Jack Daniels and he sipped it reluctantly knowing that if he refused his friends would just worry more about him, this way he kept them off his back. He hadn’t wanted to come to Lances‘, content just to curl up in his solitude and pine away for the love he had lost so easily. He stared at his bare toes, wriggling them and studying his toe-ring, anything not to have to look at his three band-mates that were watching him waiting for any sign that he was about to disintegrate into a trillion pieces. He took another sip of the strong liquor ignoring the burn at the back of his throat as he swallowed. He didn’t look up when he heard the door open and the muttered curse reached his ears. He just carried on nursing his drink and contemplating his toes. Tears began to well again in his eyes knowing that Justin was now in the same room as him and was cussing his other friends out for deceiving him into coming here tonight. One tear trailed its way slowly down his left cheek and was quickly joined by another then another. He stood up and placed his now empty glass on the small occasional table beside his chair.

“I’ll go.” he whispered apologetically. “I shouldn’t have come.” He never looked up afraid of the pity he would find in Joey’s, Lance’s and Chris’ eyes, but more afraid of the hate he knew would dominate Justin’s beautiful cornflower blue orbs. “I’m sorry Justin, sorry that I fell in love with you, I’m sorry that you don’t love me back. But most of all I’m sorry I lost your friendship and respect.” He paused wiping his eyes. “I hope that some day you will find it in your heart to forgive me.”

Joey took a step towards him reaching out to pull him into a hug only to be shrugged away. “Don’t touch me Joey, I don’t want to be touched.” With that he ran from the room and the house jumping into his jeep that was parked outside, he took a few seconds to compose himself before driving away.

Joey watched through the window as JC drove away. “You think I should go after him?”

Chris shook his head “No give him some space.” He turned on Justin. “You could have least have said sorry.”

“ME!” Justin exclaimed “What the fuck did I do?”

“You made him feel like scum, like he was worse than scum.” Chris ruffled Justin’s hair and pulled him to him. “He didn’t deserve that Justin. He didn’t plan to fall in love with you.”

“I don’t like fags.”

Lance choked on his scotch, the hair on the back of Chris’ neck bristled with anger. “You don’t like fags” he repeated. He took a deep breath. “Justin you like me don’t you?”

Justin rolled his eyes. “Well duh you are my best friend!”

“I’m a fag.”

Justin choked on his beer spitting it across the room.

Chris crossed the room to where Lance was sitting staring at his scotch. “Lance is a fag too, we are fags together.”

Justin stammered “You and … and Lance! Fuck buddies?”

“Lance stroked the side of his boyfriends face. “No not fuck-buddies, lovers.”

Chris nuzzled the blond mans hand. “For three years now.” The two lovers kissed tenderly for the first time in front of the youngest member. “I love you.” Chris crooned lovingly.

Lance groaned and pressed hard into the short brunettes hard body. “I love you to poppet.”

Justin gulped and swallowed the bile that rose in his throat. “You two are …. You do …” He made a circle with his middle finger and thumb of his left hand and made a thrusting motion through it with the middle finger of his right hand.

Chris rolled his eyes “Yes Justin, Lance and me make love, we play hide the sausage what ever the hell you want to call it.” His voice softened as he gazed into his lovers’ emerald eyes. “We love each other, and there is nothing dirty or sordid about what we do. And I have never, never regretted a single minute.”

Lance blushed crimson and snuggled his face into the older mans neck, smiling contentedly.

Joey watched Justin’s reaction to the news that two of his closest friends were in a serious relationship for a few minutes. “Guys I think I’m going to call it a night.” He hugged each of his friends in turn, reluctantly pulling Justin to him. “Make it up to him.” He hissed under his breath making the younger man pale and tremble slightly from the venom of the statement. Joey smiled widely and went out to his car, he had an incredible urge to check on JC and a nasty nagging feeling in the pit of his stomach that just wouldn’t go away.


Pulling into his drive JC sat his eyes fixed on the black leather steering wheel beneath his hands for five minutes before forcing himself to move. He climbed out of his four-wheel and leaving the door open made his way into his house not caring that he had left the front door ajar. He walked through the dark hall not bothering to turn on the lights as he ascended the open plan staircase to his room. Walking into his en-suite he stood before his shaving mirror. His face shrouded by the darkness. He closed his eyes as he began to shudder, his tears falling anew. He leaned forward his forehead pressing against the cool glass. “Why?” he cried “Why won’t you love me Justin.” He gulped back his grief and stared again into his own eyes, trying to see what repulsed his friend so much. He lowered his eyes unable to face himself anymore. His shoulders sagged and he pulled his bottom lip into his mouth catching it between his teeth as his eyes rested on a pair of scissors. He lifted them testing the weight in the palm of his hand, splitting them open and running his thumb over the sharp edge, hissing as the razor edge cut his skin.

Spots of blood dripped onto the pure white porcelain. He watched fascinated as the droplets ran into each other. Splitting the scissors wider he lifted his wrist, turning it upwards exposing the veins that showed through his pale skin. He pressed the blade against his flesh shaking. His breath came in short pants as he lost control of his shaking hand dropping the cutting tool into the sink with a loud clatter. “Useless.” He screamed at himself. “Useless, useless fuck.” He snatched the scissors back up and seized a great chunk of his hair sawing it off and throwing it in the sink. Repeating the action again and again. Hacking off the brunette curls that he had nurtured and grown since Justin happened to mention he thought he would look good with long hair. He dropped the scissors again shocked at what he had done, fisting his fallen locks as he slid onto the floor.

Joey drove round and round the block that JC was living in, passing by his house again and again waiting for a light or some sign of life. Noticing the jeep in the drive he pulled up behind it. Walking round it shaking his head as he reached in and took the keys from the ignition and locked the battered old four-wheel. He strolled up to the front door finding it open. He pushed it tentatively poking his head round into the darkened hallway.

“Jace” He called softly coming all the way inside and closing the door behind him and flicking on the lights. He stood listening his head cocked to the side. “Jaycee.” He called a bit louder. Noticing JC’s flip-flops at the bottom of the stairs. He slipped out of his own shoes and padded quietly up the stairs.

JC’s bedroom door stood wide open and he peered inside . Joey stood with his hands resting on his hips looking round, ’JC has to be somewhere’ he thought. He walked over to the en-suite intending to take a leak flipping on the light and jumping with a start as he caught sight of the brunette hugging his legs his face buried in his knees. He gasped at the wads of hair in the sink and spilled on the floor.

“Jaycee what have you done!”

“Cut it.”

Joey picked up the silken locks rubbing them between his fingers. “Why? Why did you do that?”

“It was for Justin. He wanted me to grow it, see what it looked like.”

Joeys sighed. “But baby I thought you liked it too.”

JC began to cry again. “I did. Oh god what have I done?” He brought his hand up to his head rubbing the uneven cut. He lifted steely blue liquid eyes. “what did I do Joey?”

The big Italian sat down on the floor next to his friend and hugged him close placing a kiss on the rough hair. “Its only hair Jace. It’ll grow again in no time.” He couldn’t suppress the contented sigh that slipped from between his lips as the slim man snuggled closer to him allowing himself to relax in the strong but tender grip he was surrounded with.

“Why won’t it stop hurting Joe?” JC whispered sadly.

“Give it time.” Joey placed a chaste kiss on the top of JC’s head.

“I ruined everyone’s night.”

“Nah; it was a bad idea to bring you both together so soon.” Joey hugged the fragile man tighter. “The wounds are still too raw. Come on.” He got to his feet extending his hand to help JC up. “Time for you to get some sleep.” The brunette allowed himself to be helped to his feet and led to his bed. “We’ll get your hair sorted tomorrow. Okay?” JC nodded accepting the big mans solution.

“Will you stay tonight?” cool blue eyes looked hopefully at the younger man.

“You want me too?”

JC nodded again. “take what room you like they’re all made up.” This time it was Joey’s turn to nod.

“Goodnight JC.”

The brunette had already curled up cocooning himself in his duvet.

“Nite.” He said, sleep already marring his voice.


Joey stretched his long limbs yawning. He smacked his lips together and blinked his eyes clearing sleep from his eyes. On the side a clump of JC’s hair lay as proof that he hadn’t dreamed that the usually calm thinking man had desecrated his crowning glory. He groaned knowing how distraught the gracile man was going to be in the cold light of day. He checked his watch, 10.30; he scrambled around in his pants pocket finding his cell phone. Scrolling down his address book he found his hairdresser, quickly dialling he arranged an appointment for lunchtime asking for discretion from the stylist involved.

He swung his long legs off the bed and went to his bathroom to splash water on his face and clean his teeth. By the time he came out JC was sitting meekly cross-legged on his bed waiting for him.

“Morning. How you feeling?”

JC shrugged “Head-ache, I cried a bit last night.” He looked up and gave a small smile. “I’m ok now though, even if I do look like I’ve been in a fight with a lawn mower.”

Joey chuckled at his friends’ half-hearted attempt to make light of his hair. “I made you an appointment, midday at my salon. That ok with you?”

JC nodded “yeah, thanks Joe, for everything. I really messed up this time didn’t I?”

Joey smiled “Not you Jace. The only looser I can see is Justin.” Joeys smile widened to a cheesy grin. “You going to sit there feeling sorry for yourself all day or are you going to feed me?”

JC groaned. “There’s no food in the fridge I haven’t been shopping.”

“Take out then?”

JC nodded enthusiastically. “McDonalds.” Joey laughed out loud at the excitement that flooded the eyes that were before shrouded in sorrow.

“Come on.” He held out his hand for JC to pull himself up off the bed. “You’ll want to play in the ball pit next.

“You think we could?”

Joey groaned it was going to be a long day.

JC was positively bouncing by the time they sat in a secluded booth with their food he had pulled a multi coloured beanie over his chopped locks and was now tucking into his Big-Mac with relish. He tore the top off his sweet and sour sauce licking his fingers before dunking his fries and stuffing them into his mouth. He took a big bite of his burger dribbling ketchup and mustard over his chin.

“Hungry Jace?” Joey asked sarcastically.

JC chewed his food carefully before swallowing. “I haven’t eaten since Wednesday, well not really.” He took another massive bite proving his point. He belched covering his mouth as he bust out giggling. “scuse me.” he wiped his chin with a tissue and reached for his Pepsi and sucked mouthful after mouthful down his throat resulting in another extremely loud burp.

“Jesus Jace. And people say I’m uncouth.”

JC giggled and took another bite. “What time is it?”

Joey looked at his watch. “11.30, we better get a move on, you finished yet?”

The beanie wearing man nodded and collected up his wrappers on his tray and disposed of them in the waste bin. He grabbed another tissue wiping his mouth one last time dropping that into the trash too. He looked longingly at the ball pit a cheeky grin on his face.

Joey rolled his eyes. “Five minutes and if we get arrested I’m telling them it was your fault.” with a happy yelp JC ran and landed double footed in the pit grabbing up a handful of balls and pelting Joey with them. The Italian groaned at his friends childish display and did a belly flop into the brightly coloured plastic filled pit sending JC flying backwards landing on his butt and promptly disappearing under the round toys. Joey dived in after him pretending to swim. JC was laughing so hard when he re-emerged that he had tears rolling down his face.

“Excuse me!”

JC tried not to giggle out loud as the restaurant manager stood staring at them his hands on his hips. “The ball-pit is for under fives only.”

“Sorry.” Joey muttered as he blushed bright red, JC giggle spluttered out unable to contain himself any longer as they climbed out and made a dash for the door and Joey’s truck. “I can’t believe you wanted to do that Jace.”

“What, you think I can’t have fun.” JC was wiping his eyes a grin planted firmly on his lips.

Joey shook his head “You never fail to amaze me JC. Last night you were almost suicidal and today ….”

JC let his smile slip and watched his fingers picking at each other. “Yeah well I did a lot of crying and a lot of thinking and I decided I’m not going to cry no more. Justin doesn’t want me, I accept that now. Maybe I won’t ever find someone that does, I don’t know. But I have good friends that support me and a family that loves me.” He paused and a smile fluttered across his lips. “Today is the first day of the rest of my life. New me. Starting with my new hairdo.”

“Hairdo shit.” Joey started his truck and pulled off the car park into the traffic with a new respect for his band-mate.


15 minutes later JC was sitting in front of a mirror having his handy work examined by a very effeminate hairstylist. The brunette had the decency to look suitably chastised as the young man lifted the hacked strands distastefully.

“What you don’t think you provide me with enough of a challenge Joseph that you have to bring me this?”

The stylist stood limp-wristed his scissors dangling of the ends of his fingers as he looked thoughtfully at the mess. He lifted up a long strand neatly snipping it off. “No need to keep that I think, well not unless you want to try and revive the rattail look.” He sighed deeply. “well sweet-pea we have a choice. We can go back to that adorable little short back and sides that you had for the no strings attached tour or we can attempt the pop odyssey.” He sighed again and snipped another long strand that was hanging all alone at the side of JC’s head.

JC caught his bottom lip between his teeth and looked up at Joey waiting for him to give his opinion. The stylist rolled his eyes “Nah-ha honey, me stylist him nobody.” The gay man made a big deal of shooing Joey out of his salon. “Go, go, go, go. Buy yourself some thing pretty by the time you get back I promise sweet-pea there will look like a god.”

Joey cast a look that screamed sorry but you are on your own with this one before retreating out of the shop leaving JC with a wild look in his eyes as the stylist turned his attention back to him. The last thing that Joey heard before the door swung shut was “You know pink highlights would look fabulous with your colouring.”

By the time Joey decided to brave the stylists again JC was beaming. His hair was now curling prettily round his face and all the jagged edges had been smoothed away.

“Am I good or am I fabulous?” The stylist gloated.

“You’re fabulous Matty, its perfect thank you.” JC turned his head from side to side admiring his new look. “What do you think Joe?”

Matty rolled his eyes for the umpteenth time that day. “Sweet-pea what did I tell you about Joeys sense of style? Now go shoo, and don’t you ever cut your own hair again.” JC smiled and picked up his bag.

“I need to lie down after that.” Matty said as he strutted back towards his office. “Oh my dear god.” He groaned and snatched the scissors out of one of his underlings’ hands. “Get Miss Thing here a coffee I have the feeling she’s going to need caffeine when she sees what you just did.”

Joey and JC left the shop laughing.

“It does look good Jace.”

The brunette blushed. “Thanks. But oh my lord where did you find Matty? He’s like the gay maid in the birdcage and Jack from Will and Grace all rolled into one. I swear if he called me sweet-pea one more time.”

Joey let out a raucous laugh. “I was genuinely scared to come back in case he talked you into the pink highlights. I know you have a weird obsession with pink.”

“You think that was bad.” JC chuckled “It was all I could do to persuade him that I really didn’t want to go back to the Julius Cesar look I had when I was 19.”

They got back into Joey’s truck, the big Italian pulled off the parking ticket and stuffed it in the glove compartment with the others. “What now?” He asked.

JC thought for a while. “What about a movie?”

“Anything in mind?”

JC grinned. “Yeah actually I do”

It was dark by the time they arrived back at JC’s house. “I can’t believe you made me sit through monsters inc.”

“It was cool, didn’t you think the little girl was a cutie?” JC gushed as he unlocked his door.

“Yes but if you tell anyone I said that I’ll kill you.” Joey leaned in and placed a soft kiss on JC’s lips. “I had a nice day Jace.”

JC lowered his eyes looking up again deeply into the chocolate brown orbs that hovered just in front of his own. “So did I Joe.” He whispered.

“I’ll call you.” Joey brushed his lips over JC’s upturned mouth once more. Making him drop his face to his chest coyly.

“K.” He sighed “Goodnight Joe.” the Italian went back to his truck a huge grin plastered over his face.


“I thought we could go to Disneyland.”

“Really!” JC’s eyes shone with excitement. “Dude its been years since we did that. Do you think we should ask Lance and Chris too?”

Joey’s face dropped a little. “Well I guess we could. But we’d have to invite Justin too. It wouldn’t be fair to exclude him.”

JC considered the problem. “Maybe he won’t want to come.”

“Well he might what then?”

JC lifted his head up high “I can cope, its been weeks now. I have to face him again soon when we start recording again. Its better that we do it now when I can still walk away.”

Joey hugged the older man to him and kissed him softly on his lips, flicking his tongue over the plush cushions of rose coloured flesh. “you are truly amazing Jace.”

JC’s cheeks flushed and he shifted slightly in the Italians strong arms. “Call them Joe.”

“You sure you don’t want to go just you and me?”

JC chuckled. “It’s a tempting offer Joe but I need to do this. I need to show him that I survived without him and that I’m stronger and happier than I ever was before.”

“He’s a survivor (What?)

He’s not gon give up (What?)

He’s not gon stop (What?)

He’s gon work harder (What?)

He’s a survivor (What?)

He’s gonna make it (What?)

He will survive (What?)

Keep on survivin' (What?)”

Joey sang at the top of his voice as JC tried to clamp his hand over his mouth. The bigger man just pinned the giggling mans hands behind his back and sang into his face. “He’s a survivor (What?)

He’s gonna make it (What?) Keep on surviving.” He captured JC’s mouth once more under his own silencing the laughter momentarily. “I can’t promise you forever Jace, just here and now.”

“That’s good enough”

They spent the rest of the day jumping on and off rides. Running rings round their friends as they enjoyed the moment. Justin scowled at Joey as he swung JC round by his waist whispering in his ear making him blush and slap him playfully on the shoulder. The big Italian brought out the child in JC, throwing him over his shoulder and running him down the path and depositing him into a trashcan. Leaving the thin man in fits of laughter as he tried to get free.

“Jace. Can we talk?”

Justin caught hold of his wrist pulling him behind a stuffed toy stand. JC shuffled from foot to foot his hands pushed deeply into his back pockets. “Your hair looks good that length.” JC’s hand automatically went to his head.


“I’m sorry JC. I was an idiot.” The look in the young blondes eyes was sincere. “ I was scared .. Scared that I was a fa…. Gay too.”

JC stood silently his head down looking at his sneakers. “JC I made a mistake. I miss you, I miss us. Jace for gods sake say something please.”

JC looked up meeting the younger mans eyes. “Joey’s waiting.” he started to walk away.

“You don’t love Joey. You love me.”

JC turned slowly and walked back to where Justin stood and kissed him sweetly on his lips. “Joey’s waiting.” he repeated.

Justin gazed into his eyes and swallowed. “Its just rebound you know that don’t you?”

JC pulled away. “Maybe.” he said as he walked away.

The End.

Michelle Stories
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